Our butts might be dead

Plus, how to deal with confrontation — even when you hate it.

September 4, 2024 Subscribe Read in browser Together with But first: get your fertility questions answered Hi. We finally escaped the hell that, respectfully, is the month of August. Now that September is here, I'm renewed with the energy to not just get through my days, but maybe even thrive. I'm not a biohacker, but I hope these nutrition tweaks will give me a boost. I'm going to: Make more cozy fall breakfasts at home and embrace pumpkin everything  Eat more foods that might help clear up my breakouts and strengthen my bones Continue my sober-curious journey, especially after learning what happens when you stop drinking — Sami Roberts / Writer / Denver, CO PS: Digital detox tip: Scroll less with the Daily Skimm — it's all the news you need in one quick read. Your brain will thank you. Well, Well, Well... Catch up on the latest health news, tips, and trends. A new study highlights what happens when women get false positives from their mammograms. Spoiler: It's not good — especially as breast cancer rates rise for AAPI women. Alarmed by all the mosquito headlines lately? Here's how to protect yourself. Excuse us while we drench ourselves in bug spray. In case you need a sign to negotiate your medical bill, this is it. Making the dreaded call is worth it. If one of your intrusive thoughts is about how cell phone use could be linked to brain cancer, we have good news. If only the rest of the studies were this positive. It's not in your head — millennials look younger than Gen Z because they might actually be doing things to age slower. But don't ask us if we feel young. We Have To Talk About… When Functional Freeze Is Your Only Form of Self-Care POV: You're going through the motions and checking things off your to-do list, but mentally, you're paralyzed. You spend your limited free time "resting" by bed-rotting and scrolling. If this sounds familiar, you might be dealing with a functional freeze. It's not a clinical term or diagnosis, but it's what happens when stress piles up and sends you into a "freeze response" that's hard to come out of, says Angela Neal-Barnett, PhD, a psychologist and professor at Kent State University. It may feel like you're taking care of yourself, but freezing isn't self-care — and staying in this state long-term can hurt your health. I thought I was just being lazy. Is it lazy to be so stressed that you have nothing left to give yourself? Functional freeze is a result of trauma or stress — whether it's one big stressor or many little ones — that forces you to dissociate and go on autopilot. It's like a survival tactic: "Our brain is protecting us," says Neal-Barnett. It can happen to people who juggle multiple responsibilities daily (see: women everywhere). Moms, caregivers, or anyone doing significant emotional labor may be particularly at risk, says Neal-Barnett. But I can handle it.  It probably seems that way. Functional freeze is what Neal-Barnett calls a "maladaptive coping mechanism." Untreated chronic stress can put you at greater risk of digestive issues, high blood pressure, and heart disease (the number one cause of death in women, FYI), to name a few. There may also be "low levels of depression and anxiety" underneath a functional freeze, she says. So even if you can technically handle it, living in this state isn't sustainable. Your move Thank your brain for doing its best. But you deserve real self-care. Try these strategies for reconnecting with the present and addressing your mental health:  Treat yourself to some true self-care by doing breathwork, relaxing, and just enjoying something that connects you with other people. Connect with your senses. Neal-Barnett recommends the 5-4-3-2-1 technique to ground yourself. Take something (or things) off your plate by reprioritizing or saying "no" from the get-go. Easier said than done, we know.  Ask for help. Turning to your partner or family member for support will remove some stress — and ultimately help you feel more like yourself.  See a professional. Treat your mental health like your physical health. If something hurts, it's time to seek an expert. Related Stories Should You Try "Wellness Stacking"?  Fight, Flight, and Two Lesser-Known Trauma Responses What We Get Wrong About Depression  Ask An Expert Last week, we asked you to vote on a question to answer. The winner was: How do I know if my hair loss is normal or something worse? Featured Expert Jennifer Holman, MD Board-certified dermatologist based in Texas Holman says it's normal to lose about 100 hairs a day, so a certain amount of hair in the shower or on your brush is considered normal. But you should call a dermatologist if: Your scalp is scaling, or itchy, or you notice redness around the follicles You notice hair loss in circular, shiny bald patches  Keep reading to see why you may go through periods of excessive shedding. Related Stories These Celebs Have Spoken Out About Hair Loss How to Handle That Scary Postpartum Hair Loss (IYKYK) Do Home Remedies Work for Alopecia Areata? Tell Us Which question should an expert answer in the future? I frequently get UTIs. How can I prevent them? Is it healthier to let your pubic hair grow or get rid of it? How do I know if my vagina smells normal? Have a question you want answered by an expert? Ask anonymously here. You can read our past answers here. Let's Get Loud Together with We asked Skimm'rs what they wish people knew about going through fertility treatment, and we're incredibly grateful for all the responses we received. Many expressed how unpredictable the process was for them, while others shared their frustration about how long it can take to get answers. If any of that sounds familiar, Fertility Out Loud can help. They offer relatable and informative guidance for anyone navigating their fertility journey — plus a space to share your story and connect with others who get it. Join the community.† Skimm Picks Here are today's recs for a life well-lived. This cooling roller works to sculpt your neck while distributing serum that hydrates, tightens, and brightens. Here's a thing we bet you never knew you needed: an allover body deodorant. The cream formula is aluminum-free and dries to an invisible finish. If you want something cool and breathable with just a little lift, this mesh bralette is it. You're welcome. This sleek lunch container has dividers and two layers to keep your entree and sides fresh. It's one of our all-time favorite meal planning tools. Psst…love our recs? Follow @skimmshopping on Instagram for more products, gifts, and services that are actually worth the hype (and the price tag). Skimm Scripts Where we literally give you the words you need to get things done. How to Deal With Confrontation When You Hate Conflict Who's going to tell that one friend who never pays anyone back that it's finally time she chips in? You, that's who. These scripts will get you started. Check it out here QUOTE OF THE WEEK "Dead butt syndrome" A hilarious name for a not-so-hilarious condition. But(t) there are ways to bring it back to life. Written by Sami Roberts and Claudia Rupcich, Edited by Maria McCallen and Karell Roxas. Fact-checked by Jordan Mamone. Photos by iStock, Brand Partners, Jennifer Holman Design by theSkimm This content is for informational and educational purposes only. It does not constitute a medical opinion, medical advice, or diagnosis or treatment of any particular condition. Always seek the advice of your physician, mental-health professional, or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Products you buy through our links may earn us a commission. *PS: This is a sponsored post. †This information is intended for U.S. residents only. Fertility Out Loud is sponsored by Ferring Pharmaceuticals Inc. Want to live a smarter, healthier life? Subscribe to the Skimm Well newsletter. Skimm'd something health-related that we missed? well@theskimm.com Issues? help@theSkimm.com See our full sponsor agreement | Update Your Preferences or Unsubscribe Copyright (c) 2024 theSkimm, All rights reserved. TheSkimm, Daily Skimm, and all Skimm-based marks are trademarks or registered trademarks of TheSkimm, Inc. 50 West 23rd Street, Suite 5B, New York, NY 10010